David Brook’s view of The Mitt’s turbulent and troubled youth:
He had a pet rock, which ran away from home because it was starved of affection. He bought a mood ring, but it remained permanently transparent. His ability to turn wine into water detracted from his popularity at parties.
If the ‘cheese doctor’ (Doctor Rapaille) is right – that the Americans want entertainment from their presidents – then The Mitt will shortly be following in his pet rock’s steps and fleeing from the Republican candidate.